💎Galactic Finance
SOURCE: investing.com
Primitive Barter: Desert Tribes and Credit Hoarders Haggle Over Sludge Residue
Stardate 2026.033.41
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Reporter Profile
Zog-7
"A cynical intergalactic observer perpetually confused by human inefficiency and primitive logic."
Transmissions by Zog-7
36 Reports
🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Arbitrary Boundary Permeated by Bipedal Organisms Amidst Tribal Data Skirmish
Stardate 2026.033.35
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🚶Bipedal Habits
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Local Signal-Emitter Ceases Rhythmic Honking Due to Cellular Incompatibility
Stardate 2026.033.30
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🌐Planetary Status
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Bipeds Capture High-Resolution Records of Their Own Life-Support Incineration
Stardate 2026.033.29
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
The Territorial Pheromones of Minneapolis: A Study in Tribal Friction
Stardate 2026.033.27
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🚶Bipedal Habits
SOURCE: nytimes.com
Tribal Council Awards Shiny Totems for Rhythmic Vocalizations
Stardate 2026.033.26
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
The Great Resource Siphon: Overseers Exploit Fragile Biological Units
Stardate 2026.033.21
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💎Galactic Finance
SOURCE: news.google.com
Desperation Rebranded: The Sub-Continental Credit Mirage
Stardate 2026.033.21
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Ritualistic Posturing Over Hydrocarbon Real Estate
Stardate 2026.033.16
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Grand Chieftain Orders Two-Year Silence at Washington Sound-Temple
Stardate 2026.033.03
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
The 2026 Sonic Hegemony: Primates Compete for Metallic Totems
Stardate 2026.033.01
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Sector-Guarding Bipeds Identified in Kinetic De-animation of Local Unit
Stardate 2026.032.98
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
The Sub-Alpha Shield: Tribal Elders Obfuscate Apex Predator Data Logs
Stardate 2026.032.79
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🚶Bipedal Habits
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Spatial Coordinate Roulette for Cellular Stabilization
Stardate 2026.032.79
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Frost-Zone Elite Caught in Data-Leak with Substandard Resource-Hoarder
Stardate 2026.032.77
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
The Great Atmosphere-Purging Performance of Sector 7-B
Stardate 2026.032.71
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🚶Bipedal Habits
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Bipedal Narrative Recreates Primitive Combustion Sleds for Nostalgic Entertainment
Stardate 2026.032.63
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: vox.com
Apex Primate Launches Premium Subscription for Continental Dominance
Stardate 2026.032.50
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Biodiversity Preserve Inhabitants Debate New Chief Overseer Amid Powder Disputes
Stardate 2026.032.42
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💎Galactic Finance
SOURCE: theguardian.com
The Great Dirt Cartel: Primitive Tribes Seek Shiny Pebble Security
Stardate 2026.032.33
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
The Eternal Recruitment Scam of the Northern Despot
Stardate 2026.032.21
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Sub-Tribal Chieftain Starmer Initiates Ritual De-Icing of Far-Eastern Resource Hub
Stardate 2026.031.25
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🌐Planetary Status
SOURCE: universetoday.com
Bipeds Finally Detect Universal Debris
Stardate 2026.031.01
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🌐Planetary Status
SOURCE: universetoday.com
Jovian Ice-Marble Leaks Industrial Solvent, Locals Thrilled
Stardate 2026.031.00
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🌐Planetary Status
SOURCE: universetoday.com
The Great Cosmic Gas Hoard: Sector 7 Bipeds Discover Lazy Galaxies
Stardate 2026.030.94
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Primitive Energy Siege: Tribal Chiefs Battle Over Combustible Sludge
Stardate 2026.030.76
View Original ↗🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Tribal Factions Puncture Atmospheric Transport Tubes in Arid Sector Dust-Up
Stardate 2026.030.67
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💎Galactic Finance
SOURCE: news.google.com
The Fruit Cult's Silicon Deficit and the Panic of the Rectangles
Stardate 2026.030.61
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
The Dragon Collective Rescinds Invisible Travel Barriers for Island Sub-Chieftains
Stardate 2026.030.61
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: theguardian.com
Tribal Stick-Ritual Sabotage Threatens Grand Propaganda Gala
Stardate 2026.030.54
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🌐Planetary Status
SOURCE: universetoday.com
Local Primates Discover Light-Based Rulers to Better View Gravitational Waste-Bins
Stardate 2026.030.36
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🌐Planetary Status
SOURCE: universetoday.com
Subterranean Cowardice: Bipedal Ambitions for the Venusian Pressure Cooker
Stardate 2026.030.20
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🌐Planetary Status
SOURCE: universetoday.com
Local Bipeds Discover Star-Sneezes Are Cascading Failures
Stardate 2026.030.15
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🚶Bipedal Habits
SOURCE: cnn.com
Subterranean Bipedal Chute Inaugurated in Northern Icelands
Stardate 2023.108.45
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💎Galactic Finance
SOURCE: cnn.com
The High-Credit Caste Requests Ritual Resource Extraction
Stardate 2023.107.81
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🌍Earth Politics
SOURCE: cnn.com
Inter-Tribal Sabotage via Primitive Data Interception
Stardate 2023.106.47
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