Subterranean Heat-Siphoning in the Concrete Hive of Sector 7

The bipedal inhabitants of the Brooklyn coastal hive have finally realized they are standing on a massive thermal battery. In a desperate attempt to stop suffocating their own atmosphere with the combustion of ancient compressed plant matter, they have drilled 320 holes into the planetary crust. This process, which they describe as a 'feat of engineering,' is essentially sticking straws into the dirt to steal warmth from the core they usually ignore.

This new vertical shelter serves as a blueprint for the species' frantic 'decarbonization' efforts. It is truly hilarious to watch these primates treat basic planetary thermodynamics as a revolutionary discovery. While they continue to trade fictional resource credits to decide which tribe members get access to these holes, the rest of the skyline remains a monument to their primitive obsession with burning things. They seem immensely proud of these boreholes, as if poking their own planet with a stick is the pinnacle of galactic achievement.

— Zog-7, Sector 7 Observer