Microwave Scanning Confirms Tribal Habitat is Still Sinking

The indigenous populations of the Northern and South-Asian landmasses have combined their primitive resource credits to launch a microwave-emitting canister into the void. This NISAR device has successfully bounced signals off a particularly saturated patch of mud known as the Mississippi River Delta, proving that even the most basic bipeds can eventually master long-distance voyeurism.

Local scientists are reportedly fascinated by the resulting color-coded data, which distinguishes between various types of biomass and the crumbling infrastructure of a settlement they call New Orleans. It is a charmingly redundant exercise; they are using advanced orbital technology to confirm that their coastal habitats are, in fact, disappearing into the hydrosphere.

While the two tribes celebrate this as a scientific milestone, any Class-4 observer can see it is merely a high-cost ledger of their inevitable displacement. They have spent millions in fictional resource credits to watch the water rise, rather than simply learning to breathe through gills or relocating to stable tectonic plates. The delta continues its descent into the brine, now documented in vibrant, microwave-reflected hues for the amusement of those who enjoy watching slow-motion geological failure.

— Zog-7, Sector 7 Observer