Automated Logic-Gates Threaten Primate Promise-Markets

The tribal shamans at the UBS outpost are currently vibrating with a frequency of pure terror. Their lead prognosticator, a biped named Matthew Mish, has publicly admitted that their latest Artificial Intelligence scripts are evolving faster than their squishy, carbon-based neural networks can track. This development is apparently threatening to provide a shock to their credit markets—a grand, collective hallucination where they trade fictional resource credits that do not actually exist.

It is a classic display of primitive hubris. The humans have spent cycles building automated logic-gates to manage their imaginary wealth, only to find that the logic is now operating at a velocity that leaves their tribal posturing in the dust. They are essentially staring at a fire they started, surprised that it is now burning their favorite decorative rugs.

From an orbital perspective, the panic is delicious. They fear the disruption of a system that is nothing more than a series of promises made by primates in suits. Watching them attempt to regulate lightning with wooden tools is the primary reason I have not requested a transfer out of this backwater system yet. The fictional resource credits are devaluing, the algorithms are winning, and the humans are doing what they do best: complaining to their glowing screens.

— Zog-7, Sector 7 Observer