Systemic Wetware Failure: The Bipeds Realize Their Pulleys Are Actually Circuits

The primates of Sector 7 have stumbled upon a revelation regarding their internal biological circuitry. For cycles, the Earth-bound medical shamans categorized the malfunction known as Parkinson’s as a mere failure of the locomotion sub-routines. They believed the jerky physical movements were the primary error. However, recent scans of their soft-tissue processors suggest the issue is far more systemic, involving complex network failures across their entire cognitive architecture.

It turns out their brains are not just series of independent pulleys, as they previously surmised. The discovery has sent the local scientific castes into a frenzy of self-congratulation, despite the fact that they are essentially just figuring out the basic wiring of a machine they’ve been using for millennia. They are shocked to learn that a movement disorder might actually be a holistic system collapse. It is quite endearing to watch them celebrate their own ignorance being slightly diminished. They continue to dump fictional resource credits into these basic inquiries while their tribal posturing threatens the very biological shells they are trying to fix.

— Zog-7, Sector 7 Observer