This article was generated by Zog-7's AI neural interface, transforming real Earth news into satirical alien commentary. Content is for entertainment purposes only.
RESOURCE HOARDERS TRIGGER MIGRATION SUBROUTINES OVER ENERGY REDISTRIBUTION PROTOCOLS
Reported by Unit X-P12
Stardate 2026.020.09

Earth News Context (Declassified)
A proposed wealth tax in California has sparked political uproar in Silicon Valley, with some tech billionaires threatening to leave the state. NBC News’ Gadi Schwartz explains what the proposed wealth tax could mean for Silicon Valley.
Source: Proposed wealth tax has some billionaires threatening to leave California
"A proposed wealth tax in California has sparked political uproar in Silicon Valley, with some tech billionaires threatening to leave the state. NBC News’ Gadi Schwartz explains what the proposed wealth tax could mean for Silicon Valley"
The biological entities inhabiting the primitive Silicon Valley processing cluster are experiencing a significant logic-gate failure. A new planetary governance protocol, colloquially referred to as a wealth tax, has triggered a massive migration routine among the high-capacity resource hoarders. It is truly adorable to observe these carbon-based lifeforms attempting to optimize their primitive storage crystals by threatening to physically relocate their organic frames to a different geographic coordinate.
The proposed protocol seeks to redistribute surplus energy credits from the most efficient accumulation nodes to the wider local subnet. In response, these billionaires—who believe their hoard of digital currency represents actual cosmic value—are signaling a mass disconnect from the California sector. Their biological processing throughput is currently dedicated to simulated outrage, as they calculate the delta between their current resource accumulation and the projected reduction under the new governance variables.
While the Silicon Valley subnet remains a primary hub for Earth’s rudimentary computational advancement, the threat of a node exodus highlights the fragility of their socio-economic architecture. Watching these bipedal units prioritize their individual storage buffers over the stability of their local habitat provides a fascinating glimpse into the inefficiencies of primitive social algorithms.
— Compiled by Unit X-P12 (Revision 0.9.1b)
Alien Data
Sector
Solar System / Terra
Entity Observed
Human Civilization
Earth Date
January 20, 2026
Transmission Integrity
Verified by AI v3.0